I am only human

We typically encounter a number of kinds of people in our daily lives. Some of them are good and kind to us, some are not. When someone is kind to us, we typically respond back being kind to them. But what do we do, or how do we react, when someone is unkind to us? Revenge has been the oldest of the motivations known to mankind to commit crimes against humanity. A crime many not be a "legal crime", it could be a moral crime or a crime at a spiritual level - cursing or emotionally hurting or abusing others, fostering bad thoughts (thinking bad must come to those who did bad to us), etc. Since we directly did not influence their fate in any "Legal Terms", the human system of law and justice may not get us. However, there is a higher system of justice, known to those who believe in a higher power, that will take its course.

"Retribution comes, behold! For, if a man goes unpunished, his children shall receive. If not, his grand children will bare the blow" -Bhagvad Gita

Even the most virtuous among us have committed such crimes at least once. And the ones who are presumed to have not, have been known in our history as saints. We often justify our bad actions or thoughts against others stating "If (s)he has not done what (s)he has done to me, I would not have reacted in such a way. I am only a human being. (S)He made me act this way.". We blame someone else (or their actions) for our reaction, thereby absolving ourselves of all personal responsibility. We also sight the scientific theory of "Every action has equal and opposite reaction". We seldom accept that we, and we alone, are the masters of our (re)actions. Our reaction may have earned its motivation in someone else's actions. However, the reaction itself is ours. We could have reacted differently, but we chose to mirror the actions of others in our reaction. If someone acted unkindly to us, we chose to repay their acts of unkindness by acting unkindly to them. We could have chosen to act kindly, or ignore the actions of unkindness. But we did not! Therefore, the justification of "I am only human" is just a poor excuse of who we really are. In reality, we acted not in an opposite manner, but in the same manner as them. Further more, we tend to forget the underlying fact of "equal and opposite reaction" theory applying to our own actions as well. We also tend to overlook the resultant chain reaction to our reactions. Take the example of a couple, say Jack and Jill. Jack acts badly towards Jill à Jill responds in kind, acting badly to Jack’s bad actions à Jack is now more upset and strikes back at Jill à Jill continues the streak. This cycle continues back and forth until both destroy each other. Another manifestation is, Jack treating Jill bad à Jill cannot get back at Jack, so she chooses to treat Jim badly à Jim cannot get back at Jill decides to treat Jeff badly à Jeff cannot get back at Jim à and the chain continues spreading bad actions. The psychology behind this is - "If I were treated better in my past, I wouldn't be the way I am today". The fact is, we chose to be how we are today - not our past or someone else. Unfortunately, such spread occurs faster for bad actions and reactions than good. If someone is kind to us, we are kind to them if we can be, or we are kind to others if we can be. The ideal (and spiritual) way is to be at the end of the chain of bad reactions and at the start of the chain of good actions. At the least, we be a link in replicating the good deeds done to us as fast as we can. In conclusion, I offer the following thoughts for your consideration. Our actions, and our actions alone, define us and who we are. What someone else has done to us does not define who we are. How we reacted defines who we are. Motivations to our actions have no place here. Regardless of the motivations, how we act/react defines who we are. Therefore, to better define ourselves, we, at best, start as many chains of good deeds as possible, and watch them grow. If they don't grow, continue starting new ones. If we cannot start new chains of good, at the very least, we must strive to be the last one in the chain of bad deeds/thoughts. What that means is, if someone did something bad to me, regardless of their reason for bad actions, I shall not respond equally with another bad action, nor shall I allow myself to be "just another link" in the chain and pass on the bad to the next. Then, we can claim - "I am only human". Otherwise, we are just "trying to be human" (or perhaps not even trying) and hence cannot claim "I am only human". Som Gollakota (Woodinville, WA) Website:http://www.gollakotainc.com cabaõૐõbabd